The Christian Girl’s Guide to Self-Care: 5 Best Practices for Wives and Moms

If you cringe when you hear the word “self-care,” I get it!

I know for my self, it conjures up thoughts that are counter to the word of God – thoughts such as “Love yourself,” “Be true to yourself,” “Follow your heart,” and “You do you,” – thoughts that are all at the expense of others.

But really, “Healthy self-care, at its core, is about restoring internal balance and equipping us to love well.” Alison McLennan

So, if you’re looking for ways to restore balance and vitality to your life as a wife and mom, this post will help you to do just that!

Exhaustion & Sacrifice are Par for the Course

As a wife and mom, so much of my time is consumed with the proper care and feeding of my husband and children, and if you’re reading this blog, I’ll assume this is a priority for you, too.

Being faithful in my high calling as a wife and mom is not something I take lightly. As a result, I aim to serve my husband and children, and create a home life for them that is nurturing, spiritually edifying and brings honors to Christ.

But, oh! This can be so exhausting!

As wives and moms, because we’re always looking for ways to add value to our family’s life, exhaustion and sacrifice are par for the course. And while we’re not complaining about it and we would never keep score, sometimes we need to be reminded that it’s OK to add ourselves to the list of people we care for

That’s what this post is all about. It’s my reminder for YOU to take some time for yourself. It’s about encouraging you to take time to fill YOUR cup so that you can continue to joyfully pour yourself into your family

And while the phrase “self-care” has gotten a bad rap lately, I can assure you there is nothing selfish about these practices.

In fact, by employing these 5 practices you will add balance and vitality to your life as a wife and mom

So without further ado, let’s get started! 

 

1. Schedule Time to Do “Nothing”

It’s OK to relax, sleep, or even just sit and hear yourself breathe – deeply in, s-l-o-w-l-y out. We don’t always have to cook, clean, volunteer, or run a mental to-do list. (Mental rest is a thing, too!) Ironically, some of us have to schedule “nothing” time into our calendars just to make this happen. Like the NIKE slogan says, Whatever it takes, Just do it! 

“… Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” – Jesus (Matthew 11:28-30)

*This post offers the ultimate life hack for busy moms who are struggling to find alone time: When a Trip to the Dentist is as Good as the Spa.*

 

2. Be Lighthearted & Laugh: Be Joyful!

Have fun and look for the silver lining in every day happenings. Laugh at yourself! It teaches your children that it’s okay to laugh at themselves. And don’t just chuckle; laugh out loud! ?

Ask yourself: “Is my child’s heart cheerful because of the expression on my face? Do they see that I’m sour towards their dad?” Your relationship with the Lord is not only an effective witnessing tool, but it greatly affects the mood in your home. If you struggle with joy in your own life, it will be difficult to pass joy on to your children.

“A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” (Proverbs 17:22)

*You can read this post to get a laugh at my expense: Gynecological Adventures Part 1.*

 

3. Take Care of Yourself: Watch What You Eat, & Exercise

Image credit

I really hate this one, especially since I’m partial to ice cream and cake. The only exercise I excel at is the speed at which I shovel ice cream into my mouth. 🙂 But it’s true, we are what we eat: Garbage in =’s garbage out, and little energy go be the best wife and mom I can be.

A poor diet even influences our emotions, which in turn, influences our mood. Exercising regularly can do wonders for our physical AND mental health. Our bodies are a complete miracle and a gift from the Lord. Be sure to be a good steward of it!

“For bodily exercise profiteth little…” (1 Timothy 4:8a)

Hey, how’d that scripture get in there? 🙂 (Um, no post reccomendations for this one.)

 

4. Do Something You Enjoy Regularly

Tap into your creative side and take time to do something that makes you happy, like crafting, gardening, sewing, or writing. As wives and moms we spend a lot of time orchestrating play dates and fun events for others, so let’s not forget to include ourselves on that list. God is the ultimate creative being, and He created us to be creative. If our kids see that we’re passionate about something and loving life, it will encourage them to be passionate about life as well.

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” (Colossians 3:23-24)

*I unleash my inner creative by decorating my home seasonally. Read this post to take a look: The Beauty of Seasonal Decorating.”*

 

5. Forgive Yourself. Period. Then Move On

We’re sure to make lots of mistakes as wives and moms. Even with a manual for life – the Holy Bible – and the indwelling presence of the Holy Spirit, we’re going to step on more than a few family-life land mines. However, when we sin or fall short with our husband and kid(s) we should ask for their forgiveness and ask the Lord for forgiveness as well. Once we’ve genuinely confessed our sin the Father lovingly forgives us and remembers our sin no more. Don’t walk in condemnation! Accept the forgiveness that God offers. There’s nothing left to do now but to learn from our mistakes and move on. This one practice is mental self-care.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9)

***

I certainly hope that you’ll take some time this very week to treat yourself to one (or all!) of the care practices. Take some time to do “nothing,” be joyful, eat and exercise well (ice cream doesn’t count), be creative, and forgive yourself. These practices cost little or nothing, yet they will create balance in your life and increase your mental and physical vitality.

This is self-care for the body and mind. Your family is counting on you to do it.

Holla Back, Ladies: Which of these self-care practices do you enjoy most? Which one do you often enjoy? Which one would you give you right arm for a chance to do? Leave a comment below, I’d love to hear from you!

If you like this post please share it with your friends on social media. Thanks a bunch!

Come and check out where I party!


Have you downloaded my new eBook: The Art of Building a Godly Home?

Proverbs 14: 1 says there are two paths a woman can take as a wife and mom: the path of wisdom or the path of folly.

The Art of Building a Godly Home is a companion guide for the woman who chooses the path of wisdom.

Click here to grab your free copy!


 

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Comments

  1. I relate to the doing things that I really enjoy-decorating my home is what I love doing. As I am decorating and DIYing I invite the Holy Spirit in and it brings such peace in the home. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Hi bud,
    Great post! I do this often now after learning the hard way & exhausted my poor old body, mind & spirit. Trying to be God’s hero instead of His daughter! 😉
    Blessings,
    Jennifer

  3. Love these all. I am doing a better job at doing them than I used to be. I love the balance you present here. Love sacrifices, but it also takes care of itself. Like my sister says, we are not human doers, we’re human beings.

  4. So glad to be your neighbor at Moments of Hope link up. These are all great ideas! Thank you so much for the encouragement. I need to choose to “do nothing. ” I have a really hard time with that, but it is something I want to learn to be more intentional about! Great post!

  5. It’s become a buzz phrase, hasn’t it? But it sure is important. I liked your suggestions on ways to intentionally take care of ourselves. I’m at the age where even a cup of freshly brewed coffee in the afternoon feels like a real treat (also proof I’m turning into my mother).

    • Love what you said, Traci. You made me laugh! ? (By the way, it’s unreal just how much we turn into our our mothers as we age. LOL!)

  6. I really enjoyed this! Like you said we need to keep filling our cup, so that we can joyfully pour into our family. Yoga is my favorite kind of self-care. I need to practice the doing nothing more. I am really bad to forget to slow down. I am sharing and pinning.

    • Glad you enjoyed the post, Angela. I wish you more yoga and “nothing” time in the future. ? Thanks for sharing and pinning!

  7. I can’t pick one because I NEED THEM ALL!!!

    These are such good and important reminders. I find I do okay with one or two and lose track of the others. Grateful for God’s grace in the process!

    Happily pinned and tweeted!

    And I love the Matthew verse — have you read it in the Message version??? It’s my favorite!

    • Hi Rebecca, I don’t do such a great job of practicing them all either. This post was a reminder for me, too! 🙂 And, no, I’ve not read that verse in the Message, but I’ve got to check it out now that you’ve suggested I do so. Can’t wait! Thanks!

  8. Hi Tiffiney… Yes, it’s hard to pour lavishly into others when our own wells are empty and dry. The call to love others as we love ourselves is a winsome invitation …

    Yes, please!

    ;-}

    • Hey Linda, dry and empty wells just won’t do. We’re always a better version of ourselves when we find time to care for ourselves.

  9. These are such important points to remember, especially because they are easy to get overlooked in the busy days of life! Now that chronic illness has slowed me down, I can look back and see ways that God was trying to remind me to slow down, and not feel guilty about taking those few extra minutes to be alone! I am so thankful that He is with us through each season, and knows how to call us to Himself. Blessings t you!

  10. I love these tips and tricks. I am finding the line between self care and selfishness. I just started back exercising consistently. These are great ways to care for myself.

  11. Great suggestions and principles, Tiffiney! I feel like older women get this but this is so much harder for younger women, especially the ones in the trenches of motherhood, to get. I hope they learn from your years of experience as a wife and mom! Thanks for sharing and I’ll be pinning and tweeting, my friend!

    • Hey Beth, I so agree with what you’ve said here. Everything was harder for me when I was in the trenches…especially in motherhood. Thanks for the shares and for stopping by!

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