How well do you serve your husband?
This is a topic I’ve struggled with and certainly a question I’ve asked myself before…but not for any good reason.
I asked myself this because I’ve truly wondered if my attitude about intentionally NOT serving him was right. Wondered about it so many times that I eventually began praying about it…simply asking God if my behavior was right, if it pleased Him.
Yesterday, I believe He gave me the answer.
At times, I can feel incredibly overwhelmed by the demands of being a wife, mom, homeschooler and homemaker: the cooking, cleaning, serving, etc can seem to take on a life of its own and steam roll right over me. (HELP!)
The scenario usually looks something like this…
I’m slaving over the stove to cook dinner, which usually implies that I’ve been standing for up to an hour dicing, slicing, frying, stewing, stirring pots and simultaneously washing dishes. Perhaps I’m even settling a kid’s dispute or taking on additional time sensitive tasks.
For whatever reason, this is not a night were going to dine at the table, if it were, we’d be serving ourselves simultaneously. However, we still have to dish out plates of food. I still have to prepare plates for my two youngest and get them settled. So, I intentionally decide not to make Prince Charming’s (my hubby’s) plate. After all, he should be helping me take care of the kids, lest he want me to fall on my face and die. (That was ultra-dramatic, but in the heat of the moment that’s actually how I feel.)
In the very moment I decide against it, I struggle with that decision. But I justify it because he needs to do something to help relieve my burden, yet I’m the one standing there dishing out plates.
The Turning Point
Recently, Autumn and Alexis had a dispute about serving each other. (Yes, even though these two are capable of spontaneous acts of amazing service to each other, they bicker quite a bit. We’re considering couples therapy for them. 🙂 ) Apparently they argued over this in the past, so Prince Charming had already ruled on it: Alexis would have to oblige any reasonable request Autumn may ask of her (more often than not) since it was determined that Alexis’ response is usually, “No way, Autumn! Go jump off a cliff!”. (I jest. We could stop at No and a head roll.)
Laws can guide people, but it can’t change their heart. So the dispute today was about how often Alexis should comply! Ay Yi Yi!
I must have awakened on the right side of the bed this morning, because for some reason I was actually able to make a spiritual application to their dispute that very moment. This is not necessarily a common thing – more material for my prayer life!
The scripture in Matthew 20:26-28 came to mind, where Jesus said…
“…Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave – just as the Son of man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life a ransom for many”
I was able to share that scripture, pointing out what an honor it is to serve others, and doing so makes us more like Jesus. Then I had to explain what it meant for Christ to give his life as a ransom – to a 7-year-old. Basically, I said it entailed sacrifice, which never feels good and is counterintuitive to our flesh (I didn’t say counterintuitive). The gist of it was that serving, at times, means sacrifice…it will be hard and won’t necessarily feel good, but it is good because we are patterning our life after the One who came to give us life.
The entire time I was trying to explain myself…I had conviction all over me about NOT serving my husband…when it’s hard, when I feel he doesn’t deserve it, when I feel like a slave.
How well do you serve?